Horny with a 13 inch tongue

I have (of course) written about my favourite festivity at this time of year before.

No! Not the dreaded Xmas. It is a celebration of a legend that sounds far more fun...

This coming weekend, across Germanic and middle European lands it is Krampusnacht - the night the demon spirit Krampus comes to punish all naughty boys! [And girls, apparently.]

I am preparing my horn-headed outfit as we speak, replete with chains, lumps of coal and birch twigs.

'Tis the loveliest time of the year, indeed. And here's a special song about it, courtesy of a "performance artist" called Actually; actually...

Actually - Krampus Redux

He will hit you with his sticks
and lick you with his tongue...
13 inches long.

Slurp.